


Serve me Justice

by superemeralds



Category: Sonic the Hedgehog (Video Games)
Genre: Gen, Implied/Referenced Suicide, coping with guilt, honestly idk what the fuck tags even are on here im just using it to ward ya abt triggers, murder mention
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-03
Updated: 2018-08-03
Packaged: 2019-06-20 23:35:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,171
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15544698
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/superemeralds/pseuds/superemeralds
Summary: The life of the person that killed Maria Robotnik.Will Shadow ever find out?Slightly inspired by the scene in sonic x where the teacher and the journalist uncover the truth about the ARK and confront the murderer.





	Serve me Justice

**Author's Note:**

> This is very experimental and not proofread so take it with a grain of salt
> 
> I've never tried to imagine what the murder thinks about the whole situation.  
> As mentioned in KOA the murder of Maria was more of an accident than anything intentional.
> 
> It was interesting to try and think like someone like that...... but I generally have trouble imagining how people i cant fully relate to feel like, so ... yeah.
> 
> please tell me what i can do better

When I returned to Earth, reported the incident, gave my testimony and swore, amongst thousands of other survivors, to never speak of this again, I felt like I was in a trance. 

Even many years later this trance still lingers over my consciousness, repressing the guilt I was supposed to feel.

 

No one talked about it.

But everyone constantly thought about it. At least I did.

 

One of my colleagues was reported murdered by the creature. A witness of the incident killed himself on the site. Yet another witness rotted away in a mental hospital for 7 years before killing himself. Stories of others are unheard of or forgotten in time.

 

After what happened, I quit my job. I never wanted to see or hear about the military ever again. I moved to another country. I learned new languages, new cultures.

 

Pretending to be a regular veteran was easy. Pretending my deteriorating mental health was due to foreseeable or explanatory traumatic events was easy. Talking around the subject when being counseled. I lied so often that after years over years I started to believe them myself.

 

I believed the dead girl I saw in my dreams wasn’t real, but just a projection of my fears.

I lived my life like anyone else would. I left for my job in the morning. I greeted my neighbors with a smile. I attended group events with my co.workers and had a good time. I kissed my husband Good Night when I laid down to sleep.

I lived my life like that little girl didn’t exist. As if it all was just a bad dream. As if I wasn’t living the life that she deserved instead of me.

 

Then he returned. 

He returned.

 

The TV reports talked about Sonic the Hedgehog and showed a surveillance tape of a humanoid hedgehog stealing an Emerald from the National Reserve Bank. Like an unstoppable asteroid the memories crashed into me. It was him.

 

They never told me what happened to him, I didn’t want to know back then. I just wanted gone and forget. But that day I stared at the Television, obsessively rewinding to the moment they showed the surveillance tape and crying my eyes out at the image of this creature leaning against his prison walls, visibly crying out to the little girl that I had k… ki….

 

My husband was worried, such a sweetheart, about me and tried to talk me to go back to counseling for veterans. 

 

A few days after that we witnessed the destruction of the moon in person. I was terrified and felt guilty. I let the experiment escape. And I gave it every reason to hate our kind. I wasn’t even mad at it. I hated myself.

 

I would want me dead, too.

 

Three days later the TV showed a familiar face: Gerald Robotnik.

 

He too was full of hate towards me. His voice in a constant crack, his sorrow burned on his face. His misery showing in every single wrinkle.

 

I wondered if I looked anything like him.

 

Hours later, everyone already making attempts to accept their fate, news reported that two golden hedgehogs were attempting to stop the comet that no one else knew was actually the ARK.

 

In those moments I wished for nothing more but to confess to him when he managed to save the world. I heard of his powers, I had faith in him to do the right thing. If anything, I was the monster of the ARK. How could I ever redeem myself?

 

He lost everything, he tried to end it all, but in the end he realized what mattered. He saved the entire planet and died the death of a hero. And I’d have to live with my guilt, alone, forever.

 

I spiraled into depression from the guilt, but I refused to  see another counselor. I decided to break my promise and talk to my husband about it.

He smiled at me. “It’s okay.” he said and kissed my hands gently. “Those hands were never made to kill.”

 

The next year he started having such a hard time walking that we both had to get pensionated together and get permanently hosted in a pension.

 

Yet another year later we heard the news about an alien invasion in the very city I used to work in. The organisation I dispiced to badly was “laying their lives on the line for the greater good”. I was about to turn the TV off sickened, but then I saw him. He was there for a brief moment, I could’ve just seen things as unreliable as my eyes had gotten, but I was sure I’d seen him.

 

Shadow the Hedgehog was still alive.

 

The closer I came to my own death, and the more I heard about his heroic actions, the more my wish returned to confess and apologize to him.

 

I didn’t even expect forgiveness, I would also be fine with instantaneous justice served by the victim himself. Whatever judgement he had to bestow upon me, I would accept it.

 

With those thoughts I wrote him a letter to meet me at my favourite spot at a cliff off the shore at the edge of town. I waited there every afternoon for him. Every single day for five months, until the time was right.

 

So there he is. Standing. Observing. Looking back at the letter I sent him, then at me.

 

“I believe this is you.” He states as he slowly moves forward. “Is it true?”

 

“Yes. It was me..” I’m shivering in fear, aswell as guilt. “I’m sorry. I’m oh so sorry.”

 

Then he suddenly…. walks up to me and embraces me. I’m confused I don’t know what to do. I tremble.

 

“Thank you for telling me, even after all this time. It must’ve been a horrible burden to carry.” his voice sounds sad and longing, but also compassionate and gentle. 

 

“I… You…” Why is he so gentle? I deserve death, I deserve punishment. I did horrible things and acted like everything was fine, I caused so much misery and-

 

“I know how you feel.” He’s now pressing his hand to my wrinkly chest. “Your heart is broken and there’s no way to fix it. The sky weighs heavy when you carry such burdens. It’s over. It’s done.” He tugs on his lips to force a smile that does not flash his sharp teeth. He fails. “The past is long gone, but you? You’re alive. Make the best of it while you still can.”

 

For hours we just sit there on the bench at the cliff, watching the waves crash into the rocks. Observing the change of color in the sky. Listening to the sound of the world, to the song it’s trying to convey to us.

 

Finally, Shadow stands up, a tear in his eye and a smile on his face. “Maria.” he whispers and… disappears.

 

I don’t have much time left, but I’ll dedicate every last second of it to Maria Robotnik.


End file.
